Bizarro world

Yesterday afternoon I went out to the garage to hop in my car, headed for the convenience store. When I entered the garage, the first thing I noticed was the neighbor's car running with the overhead garage door 2/3 of the way open. Then I realized the upstairs neighbor lady was sitting in the driver's seat with her eyes closed!

There were bags of groceries inside her car and a six-pack of plastic 20-oz. Dr. Pepper bottles laying on the ground on the passenger side, although the door on that side of the car was closed. One of the bottles had come out of the six-pack ring set and was lying some little ways off from the rest, as if the whole six-pack had just been dropped on the concrete floor.

There were also plastic bags filled with groceries on the outside steps leading to her apartment entrance. I had seen those on my way past as I walked to the garage, but this was nothing unusual. I can think of half a dozen times I have walked by their back steps and seen groceries or laundry or other crap sitting out there, waiting for them to come back down and retrieve. I know she doesn't get around that well and her son is pretty shiftless, so I suspect she has to tote everything upstairs herself and makes several trips. She brings some up, rests, then comes down for another load.

Anyway, back inside the garage, I waved at her, thinking she would open her eyes when she heard me shut the entry door and open the overhead door on my side. She didn't budge, but I could tell she was alive because the light from the garage window was shining into the front of her car and I could see her breathing. I picked up the stray soda bottles and placed them on a metal chair sitting on their side of the garage.

I kept glancing over at her car to see if she was showing any signs of waking up. I opened my car door, got in and started my car. I kept looking over at her but as far as I could tell, she never moved. Now every time I encounter this woman out in the yard or wherever, I always manage to startle her, she says, even though I have tried not to. There were several times when I don't know how she didn't hear me coming as I purposely made noise so she would. Anyway, I figured if I tried to wake her up, I would undoubtedly scare the shit out of her. So I ran my errand.

I left the garage door open so there would be plenty of ventilation (;-) and came back within 10 minutes. I thought, if she is still there with the car running now, I am going to knock on the passenger side window and find out WTF even if she craps her pants in the process. LOL When I pulled into the garage, her car ignition was off and the soda bottles were gone. But when I pulled up parallel to her car inside the garage, to my amazement, I saw that the neighbor was still there sitting in her car, apparently sound asleep! I repeated my performance of trying to get her attention as I got out of my car, shut the door, etc. She never opened her eyes!

When I walked to my porch I saw the plastic bags were gone from their back steps as well. So her son came down, shut the car off, gathered all of the groceries from both the car and the steps, and carried them in the house, but he left his mother sleeping in their car out in the garage?! Again, I say, WTF?

Epilogue: About a half hour later I heard her thumping up the stairs. So I guess all's well that ended well. As I mentioned before, I know she doesn't walk that well so I understand why she is so loud when she goes up and down their back stairs (which are right over my back hall and right outside my bedroom), but her son is like Clem Kadiddlehopper up there. I think I have posted before that my nickname for him is Stompy Jr. LOL